Was waiting at the OB's office when the doors opened today at 8:00 AM, even though my appointment time wasn't until 8:30. I mean, it's just blood work! I signed in and within ten minutes was told I could go back to the lab. He drew my blood and I just had a peace about it. I've been praying every second I had alone for days now and just knew God was going to preform us a miracle. I was told they'd have the results in an hour, but then Dr B would need to see them before they could call me. So, I went home and waited....
Finally, at 1:00 PM, the phone rang. Eagerly I answered it. I just knew the news on the other end would be good. I mean, it had to be good. It was the main nurse. She told me that my numbers only rose by 1 point. What? What was that? Did I hear you right??? Yes. One point. It was 122.6 on Friday and this morning it is 123.8. What in the world is going on?????
The nurse said "Well, at least they're not going down. That means your baby is trying to make it. There's just so much that goes on in the first few weeks, chromosomes have to pair up. Don't give up hope yet. I believe God works miracles."
She also said Dr B wasn't sure this pregnancy would make it and wants to see me back in 1 week (next Monday) to check quant levels again. She said he wants to run additional blood work to check for various factors that could potentially be causing me to miscarry; things like clotting factors, and lupus. Dr B wants me to continue taking it easy, not to be on my feet long, take my prenatal vitamins and the Prometrium, and drink plenty of water. She then said Dr B would be out of the office Wednesday through Friday this week, but if I needed anything, one of the other Doctors could see me, or if I wanted to have my quant levels checked again Thursday, just to call her. Oh, and I'm suppose to call them if I experience any cramping or an increase in bleeding from the spotting I've already been seeing off and on.
I really thought that things were going to turn around. I know, they still potentially can. I honestly don't know if I'm going to make it to next Monday. Another whole week of waiting to see if I get to have a baby. Another whole week of waiting...
"God, give me strength. I don't feel like I can do this again. I need you to fix me. Why won't you fix me? My poor baby would have such a good home, with loving parents who would do anything for it, and a big sister who is already so excited to have a brother or sister to love. Are we not worthy? Why aren't we worthy? God, please help. I really need your help right now." ~Me
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